Mara

Last night I went with Thomas and Shaun to see the North Mississippi Allstars at the Variety, much thanks to WREK rep. It definitely was a much-needed show, as I have not seen a show proper since 2008 began.

Them funky blues must have invaded my psyche, because last night I had one of the most horrid and lengthy nightmares I’ve ever had in which a nuclear device exploded in the city, and while those who could survive tried to take shelter in thick buildings some kind of Resident Evil-style (except much faster and far more sentient) zombies began relentlessly attacking survivors and after many macabre deaths (including that of Steve Jobs for some reason) we were able to communicate with them, and then they put us through an elaborate and extremely difficult series of group or one-on-one “survival games,” of which some were deadly to play and others were not (like “twenty questions”), but failure resulted in death for sure, and success merely resulted in more games. It was as I was reflecting in the dream whilst going through such a gauntlet at the utter despair I faced – no hope for food or water and simply playing on until a mistake comes, should I continue playing the game or succumb to Death of the Endless? – that I was bitten by a small black bug on my leg in this “real” life, and after squashing it, I lay shivering for an hour, unable to return to sleep. I think that the “no end in sight” may be an allegory for a Battle I am fighting right now.

I can think of only one comparably awful nightmare, which was had when I was sleeping across from the “haunted” room in the ancient East Wing of Sumatanga’s lodge whilst a counselor for elementary camp there several years ago. The dream then was a sixth “Planet of the Apes” based on the original continuity (not a dream of me watching it, but the dream was in fact the imagined film) and the end of that dream still haunts me to the point that if I ever become a filmmaker I will include it shot-for-shot and sound-for-sound as the end of my masterpiece.